Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus....

Yep...that's what I need to do.....this song came to mind & I found it on YouTube! I posted it on facebook....guess someone else needed it too...but they posted the same song...only different singer(s).

Yep...Mom has another UTI (although the culture hasn't come back yet). I went today at supper....BUT I was invisible. I know I had to be...no one could see me, I'm sure of it.... and Mom yelled at me and closed her eyes....I left.

But tomorrow is another day...........a so uncertain day!

Not Eating.....Today

She doesn't eat much .... but today she refused to eat anything. I went at noon today. Sara was trying to get her to eat. She wouldn't eat or drink anything. She covered her mouth with her sweater & closed her eyes. She looked like she wanted to cry. She didn't eat breakfast. She did drink a cup of hot chocolate in the morning. Sara pulled the skin on her arm & showed how it stayed like that...meaning she was dehydrated. Sara says she's sleeping more. BUT....yesterday she was smiling at me when I stopped there at noon during lunch. She only ate a couple of bites. I brought her a small Snickers (her favorite). She ate it and thanked me. Sara said that after I left, she asked where Laraine went. Can it be true....did she really know me.... YaY! I got a video clip of her the other day....she smiled.

Today, it she looked like she wanted to cry....and I've seen that before...but for these 10 years that she's had dementia, I have not seen her cry. She's my mom....I don't want her to be this way... I want her to hug me. I want her to stand up & hug me.... I miss her hugs. I will cry for her.

Seriously...

How many UTI's can her body endure. Yep, test result shows another UTI...maybe she just never gets rid of them completely. It's always the same cycle. She wheels herself around like crazy for a couple of days....won't stay put, tries to transfer. Actually....yesterday she did transfer. I got a call yesterday that they were going to send a sample in to check for a UTI. They found her in the nurses' room....sitting in the office chair. She had transferred herself from her wheelchair to the office chair. Whew....glad she didn't get hurt! But....that is funny. Wish I had a pic of that! Last night she was all raring to go...wanted to be taken outside, so I took her around the sidewalk circle 3 times. There was a little wooden lady bug they'd made with her name on it. I showed her & she told me to give it to Laraine, her daughter. Tonight, she was at the dinner table but she didn't want to open her eyes...frail little body. Got her to drink some hot cocoa (with her pills on top....but those little pcs wanted to stay in the cup). She wouldn't even eat peanut butter on crackers....her favorite. She is sick. She is tired. Her body is tired. I sat there and looked around at all of the helpless people. Harriet can't talk but she sure wanted to tell me a thing or two. She kept looking at me and making noises...so I talked to her. and then I left a frail...little... old....lady sitting at the dinner room table...