I was thinking about Mom late last night and posted pictures on Facebook from Christmas Eve 2011. This year, Mom will be spending Christmas in Heaven. No more need for throw blankets to keep her warm.
A few ladies have told me that after they lost their mom, they would think of something that they wanted to tell their mom and reach for the phone or think that they needed to call her. For me, it's a little different since I haven't been able to call Mom for the past 12 years to share things with her because of her dementia. But one thing that has happened these past few weeks is that I'll be in a store and think about buying Mom something or she'd like that, etc. Then remember.....oh, that's right...she's not here anymore.
I saw a comment on Facebook last night that some lady had cut off her mother cause her mother had played favorites. That is so sad......she has a mother. I'm sure there are many broken & strained relationships between mothers and daughters. Such is life in this fallen world.
I haven't been able to take Mom out of the nursing home for the last three Christmases. We usually gave her gifts on Christmas Eve. She had "good" days those three Christmases. But....I'd much rather that she spend Christmas this year with Jesus.
I love you, Mom. Merry Christmas!
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Everything is New/Battle Hymn of the Republic
I have listened to this song many times since November 24.
http://timcoons.bandcamp.com/track/everything-is-new-battle-hymn-of-the-republic
http://timcoons.bandcamp.com/track/everything-is-new-battle-hymn-of-the-republic
18 days....
It's been 18 days.... My mom has been gone 18 days. I miss her so much. My life has been busy. Busy going to funeral visitations! I know 6 people who have died in these past 2.5 weeks...and know of 2 more. What is going on?
Oh other things are thrown in....a bridal shower, celebrating 39 years of marriage, going to the nurse practitioner to be evaluated (blood tests normal...got her to decrease thyroid meds...still getting hives), making Christmas treats to take to work, decorating the Christmas tree, taking the grandkids to Neveln fun night and then to McDonald's, a 5 yr old bday tea party, lotza hugs from a 10 month old and happiness from 5 & 2 yr old girls, pizza party with family, decorating for a 60th bday, making bday treats for work, a 5 yr old bday supper and cake eating, and daughter's bday today 12/12/12. throw in there a few times of writing thank yous. Busy days.....grieving days.
I miss my mom's smile, I miss her telling me to sit down when I went to visit her, I miss making her coffee (with 2 packets of sugar), I miss telling them what to give her to eat, I miss feeding her, I miss washing her glasses, I miss her looking in my eyes when I wrote that I'm Laraine, her daughter...I miss how excited she got when I wrote "Laraine" and she smiled real big and said that was her daughter's name too. She was a HUGE part of my life these past 12 years. But my God knows the pain and He comforts me. It is so, so hard. The pain is real....the pain is deep. I miss my mom!
Oh other things are thrown in....a bridal shower, celebrating 39 years of marriage, going to the nurse practitioner to be evaluated (blood tests normal...got her to decrease thyroid meds...still getting hives), making Christmas treats to take to work, decorating the Christmas tree, taking the grandkids to Neveln fun night and then to McDonald's, a 5 yr old bday tea party, lotza hugs from a 10 month old and happiness from 5 & 2 yr old girls, pizza party with family, decorating for a 60th bday, making bday treats for work, a 5 yr old bday supper and cake eating, and daughter's bday today 12/12/12. throw in there a few times of writing thank yous. Busy days.....grieving days.
I miss my mom's smile, I miss her telling me to sit down when I went to visit her, I miss making her coffee (with 2 packets of sugar), I miss telling them what to give her to eat, I miss feeding her, I miss washing her glasses, I miss her looking in my eyes when I wrote that I'm Laraine, her daughter...I miss how excited she got when I wrote "Laraine" and she smiled real big and said that was her daughter's name too. She was a HUGE part of my life these past 12 years. But my God knows the pain and He comforts me. It is so, so hard. The pain is real....the pain is deep. I miss my mom!
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